Monday, January 19, 2015

Fear No Man

This week went by way fast. I don't even know whats happening with lifeeee... 
There was quite a bit of disappointments, which was a little bit of a wake up call that the mission is hard. We couldnt get ahold of Tito all week, literally no one showed up to church out of the 12 or so people we had invited and the bunch that said they were coming, we found out some of the recent converts in the ward went back to drinking, smoking, coffee, lottery, etc. There were lots more things but I'd rather spend time talking about happy things. But just had to throw in there that there are some hard times here BUT God is still looking out for us and giving us blessings and tender mercies every day that keep us going and teaching and testifying that He will never leave us alone! I never doubt that God is with us, but sometimes I do with I could tweak the agency aspect of His plan and get these people to Church!! ...okay not really, but its hard sitting through Sacrament Meeting waiting for all the people that promised you they'd show up. Hopefully there'll be better luck next week in that category. 

But MOVING ON! We had some crazy moments this last week. We've spent a ton of time knocking this new apartment complex we found, and it was so awesome! :) We've found so many new people to teach, and seen a lot of blessings coming from our efforts there. 

Also Paco has started coming out to lessons with us this last week! He has been our member present 3 different times and its been INCREDIBLE to hear him share his testimony and the blessings he has seen from the gospel of Jesus Christ in his life. He tells people that applying the gospel in his life has changed him, and he talks about how going to church brings peace into his heart and lets him forget about other things going on in his life. He is awesome. 

We got to see Gilberto this week too, its been a long time since we have been able to visit with him because of his work schedule, but the lesson we had with him was so powerful. He talked about how the gospel has helped him take anger out of his heart, and that through prayers he feels peace. I don't know how to explain the feelings that were in that lesson, but to say it simply, the love I felt for Gilberto and Eva was overwhelming. I love them SO much and talking to them and hearing the things that they have gone through and the strength that they had made me feel that love so much stronger. I want to do everything I can to help them-- I want them to feel that love from God as well. I know that the gospel changes lives and brings peace, I get to see that in my life and the lives of people I am working with. 

I've probably talked about the Fear No Man challenge that our mission is doing this year, but this week I really noticed how many blessings it brings into our missionary work. Hermana Williams is a great example to me of fearing no man. She is bold in her teaching and contacting. She will talk to people everywhere and it makes me want to be better at that. Haha she will even yell down at people in the parking lot when we are on the second story of an apartment complex knocking. Also in our lessons, she isn't afraid to say really bold things that kind of call people to repentance if that makes sense... I still don't know if I will ever be like that, but I think that in a way that is what I need to do. The scriptures tell us that we are declaring repentance to the people, and also to fear not what man can do. I think some of our investigators need a more intense wake up call. One lesson we had this week was with Porfilio (investigator for 20+ years) Hermana Williams was really bold with him, and told him that if he wasn't baptized, he was taking the Lord's atoning sacrifice in vain and he would have to suffer for the sins he has committed... honestly that is something I would never picture myself saying to someone, but it made him think. When he started talking about not feeling the need to be baptized, and she said that to him, it really laid it out that his choices are to be baptized and follow the gospel of Jesus Christ, accepting the Atonement, or to keep in his ways (which he knows aren't what God wants for him). I think that was Fearing no man.. After we left that lesson, she started crying and said, "It's so sad to me that he is choosing to suffer because he doesn't want to accept baptism. He needs to understand the Atonement more" or something like that. It really struck me when she said that-- that's not the way my mind has been working, but I think that's the way my mind should be working!! This is the doctrine of Jesus Christ, and the way that He has set out for us to accept His Atonement! I am a missionary so that no soul has to endure the suffering that Christ has already done for them. I want that to be something I really come to understand... It is so easy to SAY that's the reason I am a missionary, but I want to really FEEL and KNOW that. I want that to be where my motivation comes from. 

I think that was one of the most powerful moments this past week. I cant believe I have already been out 6 months... that doesn't feel real. I know I have been learning and growing a ton, but it is really hard to see my own progress, which gets discouraging at times. There is so much I want to do and accomplish on my mission... One thing that did really help me open my eyes this past week, we had a day where a newer missionary came and spent the day with me and Hermana Stiles while Hermana Williams went to a meeting. She was talking about how stressed out and discouraged she was, how hard being trained is, how impossible it is to understand spanish, how much she doesnt feel like she helps teach, etc. As I was listening to her, I felt like I was listening to myself at the beginning of my mission. I could promise her that things really do get better and that we all feel like that. She was grateful for the opportunity to talk to us and know it isnt just her that feels that way. It made me think about how far I have come and how much the Lord really has given me strength. I know that He is looking out for his missionaries and that He wants to bless us with the things that we need to continue on, and that's what He has done for me. I know I still have a long way to go, but I won't be going it alone. He has helped me with spanish, courage, the Spirit, etc. 

I'll do a sentimental 6 month mark email next week, we have to run and teach a lesson! But I love yall so much! I really do appreciate the support and encouragement. I'm grateful for all the love I have felt-- its tender mercies of the Lord helping me feel His love through other people! I am so blessed to be in this area. There is so much work to do here! I hope you all have a great week!! :) You're my favorites!!! 
Hermana Rogers

1 comment:

  1. Thank you :)
    Your testimony, and experiences are so inspiring. Perhaps I will learn something from what you are inspire me Hermana Rogers. You are a LIVING Christ-like example, of who we ought to be. <3
    Thank you.